Straamy2 where are you from? I still love her with all my heart but she continues to treat me worse and worse. There are reasons homosexuals hide things like that from loved ones. This is beautifully written. Of course, you work. My son is 9 months tomorrow and their daddy walked out on us yet again today. Weve had a strained relationship for a while due to our busy work schedule but I never thought he would do this it doesnt make sense its all so final he wont go to relate because itll be the same answer he says!! I feel like he blames me for our failed marriage and I know that everything hehas said were all just excuses because he was too much of a coward to admit he was leaving for someone else. Psych Central does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Part of me want him back because I believed in him and that we could have grown to love each other. Looking at the whole thing, it was obviously calculated by her for a while, which hurts all the more when for example, on the Saturday night I had taken her out for an expensive meal, and she had just happily played along, said it was wonderful etc. Sure, you will have good days and bad days, I still get those, but they are now few and far between. 5 years ago I bumped in to a high school friend. He started changing as soon as he graduated. And I never told her of my past until we started to drift apart sexually after the birth of our second child, which was 6 years into the marriage. She told me she left me for four of the reasons you mentioned. emails me talks to me like these things happen. Im beyond hurt that she didnt talk to me beforehand about any issues, knowing I would have listened and helped to the best of my ability. I would suggest conseling to him. "I am in a no win situation.". For example, its typically easier to digest the idea that you and your partner grew apart than it is to consider the possibility that he or she fell out of love with you. She really screwed you. No point of taking her back at all cuz if u do she will do it again. We are both 60, we have a son of 23 and a daughter of 20 about to go to uni. I am so heart broken why would he do that to me and how will l get over him ALLTOGETHER. The feeling that if you just change yourself then he will be happy, hell never leave you, and life will be wonderful. He isnt coming back and I have accepted that as he has now told me so many times now and he just a new life without me in it. We have two girls 5 and 8. Your partner felt ignored and unappreciated. Me if I did nothing then to love him.I asked him to tell me the truth and he said he was confused that loved me but he also had feelings again for her. He told me not to cry, he couldnt handle it. Life was great than soon after he started being very mean to me yelling at me calling me names hanging up on me and than not evan coming home for days at a time. Perhaps your husband has a personality disorder. Its just an observation but she seems to have also removed all responsibility from her life its scary. I did not seek another relationship because I honoured my commitments and the Lord but in 2016 my husband finally disclosed that he was suffering from Cancer. I moved 800 miles away from everyone and everything I had to try to make this work for us and our 2 young children wasnt even 2 weeks and he left me and moved back in with her why do I still have hope why do I really believe that someday we will work things out? She says she is doing this for our marriage. It took me 27 years to realize I had married a narcissist . And, no, she doesnt want to give it to you, shes buying her way out. What is very sad today is that the great majority of women cause most divorces, and theyre without a doubt such low life losers altogether too. For me Im hoping we can get back to normal but there is some doubt. My husband left me and I am wondering how you are feeling? Hating him will only make it harder for you to move on with your life and put this marriage in the past where it belongs. Before he left, things were really rocky and we were fighting constantly, but we tried so hard to work things out. I would have been hurt and mad, but I would not have wanted to be with someone who did not want me. Trent Shelton on Facebook is a great motivational speaker. We had some issues but always thought we would work them out. What happened was, my ex husbands lawyer kept canceling the hearings, four months later they just dropped the case, by then I was so distraught. Take your life back, It is yours to live!! Knowing myself and how hard I have worked to be where I am in life, being raised in a lovely family, and overcoming another abusive relationships before I knew it was time for me to leave that relationship soon after our 6th anniversary. He sure didnt think that when we got married now did he. Hi my name is Matt. I have worked my butt off to be well. Of course, feelings change over the course of a marriageyou are not going to have those sparks flying like you did when you first met. They WOULD NOT like that at all. Hi Kelly, how are you doing these days? Ive taken 2 sessions of therapy now as I was so devastated and one thing I was told is that Im not alone. My partner of 7 years left after an argument over nothing 3 months ago and he is refusing to talk about anything. He would pick on me for everything in front of the kids. And this is incredibly helpful because it gives people a chance to talk about what they have been through and figure out a way to fix it in the future. I hope youre doing OK. Did you ever get a reason? I dropped the kids off with her mom on Sunday who had made that arrangement so to avoid me. She lives about an hour and a half away. He is not the man I have been with for the last 15 years Constantly points out my flaws and still shows no remorse at all for the horrific things she has done to our family. I am absolutely disgusted by their behavior. How do I get thru this pain? I have been divorced for 9 months. Had there been any changes in his behavior towards you? Im sorry but she has a mind of her own and can make her own mind. She tried to abduct our son from daycare and it only didnt happen because my daycare worker knew of my wifes history and that Im more of the primary caregiver because of her instability. She knows not what she does. She moved in with me for several months, but had second thoughts and ended moving to one of her relatives for a few months to sort things out. Im not perfect and have owned and taken responsibility for all my faults but the blame. Always remember that just because the past didn't turn . What do I do to save my marriage or how do find the strength to leave? I hope that your marriage works out and you and your husband will be happy once again together. And if you cant forgive him, it might be time for you to walk away from this relationship completely because this isnt a good place for anyone to be in. Help, Good Therapy!!!! So its interesting that he would say that wasnt good enough for me, that I wasnt there for him all he wanted was for someone to love him and listen to him. I know for some people, strength is a lot more difficult to find within, and some people may not have a support network around them, but with, I didnt feel like a 20 year old. People need real information or else they divorce prematurely and they often go on to divorce again and again (more research!). Dont you think you deserve better than that???? yourself or the other person. I was willing and able to do what it took, but he was committed to the fact that it wouldnt work. Your pain will pass and you will get back on ur feet again. At 42 they are prime examples of men going through Mid Life crisis. They are together now. Sometimes the warning signs of an unhappy partner are there, but you may not clearly see them. Please help I feel like Im drowning and dont know how to protect my kids from the pain they will feel, I feel horrible for you, this is going to be a very hard time but youre going to have to focus on the kids. That stayed off the booze with your love and support then started to lie and drink because theyre bipolar. The truth is that there are probably a million reasons for his or her departure, but the one you choose to believe will set the tone for your perspective, attitude, and experience going forward. And got into dark goth vampire stuff.she told me it was all just a joke. Thats were the acceptance came into play . Sometimes the more you resist the worse it is. Im not happy being left out. Big time. LOL. I hope you can continue to be strong and take the steps to be in control. To make things better. No morals and narcissistic behaviour a lot of people today you can see that with the sort of dating sites out there promoting affairs. He was very excited on Friday regarding his news that two lots became available and was texting me of how excited he was. I dont know if anyone will ever love me again! No they will not. They may view the depression as an anchor that will take you both down. "I don't like your hair that way." "You shouldn't have . It's the one that causes depressed partners to say they're no longer in love and have never loved their partners. What Nobody Tells You About the Dark Side of Weight Loss - Healthline Everyone keeps saying mid life crisis. Both knows the situation, though the comfort factor, causes them to remain in this loop until something shakes it up. This just might be a part of a painful process where you have to learn how to get over someone. He said he would always love me but that I just wasnt able to forget the past. As a couple, its a very TOXIC relationship , the best one can do is to GET OUT and have NO CONTACT. Hi I have been with my wife for 7 years we dated for 4 years and have been married for 3. 3 grown daughters. I dont know if I should trust him. He wants to separate all our assets already and wants all the momentos in our house. But if you cannot have her sort what you want with the kids and remove yourself from the situation as soon as you can so you can focus on your kids and studies. Once you enter your information, youll be directed to a list of therapists and counselors who meet your criteria. You may click to view our members full profiles and contact the therapists themselves for more information. Im not a dumb guy, I swear it. She is 49 and lives abroad and never married. Im heartbroken and sad for out two boys who love him so much. One way you may seek fresh validation and appreciation might be through a new romantic partner. Its rough but in the long run we will be better off. I cry more for my son who looks confused and thinks when Im on the phone its daddy. She was afraid to tell u sooner prob cause she was afraid it would make u mad. Coping with the end of a relationship can be difficult on many levels. the first time they ever met face to face was at the airport.love at first sight in her words.the way I found out, I was on my way to work and got a text message. 7. He was asking for her number then the conversation ended. and more lately photos on the Internet with him on holiday with a past flirt that came to light on a social net work . It is the most painful thing ive ever experienced. She said that she is tired of faking it. Theyre also communities where you can help other members solve their problems. Well the local man who wrecked his own marriage got to her and then she was after him. If he truly loves you and wants this marriage to work he will do what it takes.